I just don’t know where to start. I’m clueless. I used to…but now…
For the past few months, well, since February to be exact, I have been trying to pull myself up out of the pit. Yes, the pit. You know…that dark place you find yourself curled up in like a stray cat waiting for the firemen to come to your rescue. You hear voices all around you, and you even see a few hands reach down and try to pull you out, but you just stay there with a whirlwind of thoughts tossed to and fro in your mind.
Well, I finally made my way out of that pit, but since getting out I’ve found myself either stagnant or tap dancing around the entrance of it. Both, which are very dangerous because I can easily fall back in. I’ve been pondering on some things and asked myself, “Tiffany, what would you tell someone else who is in the same situation as you?” Well duh…I would tell them:
1. Make a choice to do something different than what you are already doing or work on being more consistent with what you’re already doing.
2. Change your mindset – It’s imperative that you become aware of any self-defeating thoughts you have, as well as, challenge those thoughts to see how true they are. I love using Philippians 4:8 to help me filter out any unhealthy thoughts. Right above verse 8 the heading says: “Meditate on These Things”. When I hear this I feel the Lord is saying to me, “Tiffany, before you allow that thought to take root in your mind, take time to deliberately think deeply and carefully about what you are thinking about.” Then I filter the thought through verse 8. Is this thought true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, or praiseworthy? If not, it has to go.
Philippians 4:8 NKJV
Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.
3. Just do it…you have to start somewhere so you may as well start where you are.
4. Refuse to compare where you are in life to where someone else is and refrain from trying to do what you see someone else doing. I know not to hit the track expecting to run 3 miles without stopping, but I do know that I’m able to walk 3 miles at a fast pace. Because I know what my capabilities are I just smile and wave to the people running past me and “stay in my lane”. I’m more successful when I keep my eyes on my goal and not someone else’s goal.
5. Take time to “Selah”…Pause/Be Still – Take time to just get away from the chaos of the world and get your mind and body still. Pause to hear what you haven’t slowed down long enough to hear. It’s ok to pull back and pause to catch up with where you really are.
6. Be present – When we allow ourselves to be present, instead of just being available, we understand that we are able to give ourselves and others our best self.
7. Separate where you see yourself (goal) from who you are (worth) – You are not defined by what you do or don’t do. So many of us have lost our identity in people, things, and just plum busyness. None of those things define us though. We have to take time to go back to our core and to our Master to discover who we are.
8. Ask yourself why then answer yourself 🙂 I promise it’s ok to engage in self-talk. Sometimes I’m able to think more clearly when I talk out loud.
9. Talk to a trusted friend or counselor who can help you sort out your thoughts and help you find a starting point.
10. Narrow your focus – Most days my mind is flooded with ideas/things I want and need to do (granted most of my ideas are really good ideas); however, I tend to stay in the decision-making stage. To overcome that I’ve learned to narrow my focus to one thing and see it through to the end before beginning something new.
11. Take bite-sized pieces – Choose to do something small where you can get immediate results and it’ll motivate you to take on bigger challenges.
12. Write – this is something I enjoy doing but lately, I’ve been keeping all of my thoughts in my head instead of putting them on paper. I’ve found the notes app on my phone to be very helpful because sometimes I don’t want to get up to write down my thoughts or I may not be near pen and paper.
It is great to envision the end before the beginning. In fact, you should do that. However, it is unrealistic to start out expecting perfection or expecting the vision to produce overnight. This way of thinking causes you to set yourself up for failure.
Avoid allowing your “perfect vision” to delay you starting the process.
Trust and believe the imperfections will weigh themselves out over time.
How can you see improvement if you lack weak areas to improve upon? You can’t. Once you realize what you need to do, and you do it, then you are not only ready to start, but you are actually ready to advance to the next level. So today choose to do one thing at a time one day at a time. Whatever you do, don’t stay in the pit. You’ll never get anything done there. Start where you are with what you have. You got this girl!
In His Love and Mine,